I’m back again for another Sunday Soul Session, well it’s Monday, so I guess a Monday Soul Session. When I tell you a sista has been going through it, boy! Can I be real and 100 with y’all? I mean really raw!?! I have been feeling like such a failure lately.
From my relationship with my boyfriend, to my career, to my health, and my finances, I have been truly sucking it up! I feel like that strong amazing woman I was 2 years ago would be shaking her head, and sipping on some tea at the tomfoolery I have gotten myself into.
I love my boyfriend and he loves me too, but as we all know, that isn’t always enough. I recently found out things in his past that definitely change our future together. There are days when I look at him and wonder “WTF am I doing here, baby girl dump him, let’s keep it moving”. And then the thought of not looking at his annoying face breaks my heart in two pieces. I have never had to work this hard to be with anyone! I am normally the Queen, I am worshipped, I get bored, then I leave. Now I have to actually work at this, be understanding, encouraging, forgiving, selfless, and loving all at the same time! And he makes everything 10xs harder because he too has to grow up, and he’s a prideful one y’all! There is nothing harder than trying to love someone who feels like they do no wrong! And y’all I already told you I’m petty.. so needless to say, things get crazy in my love affairs!
Gosh, that alone makes me want to take a nap on a beach… with a strong drink… with Morris Chestnut!
Well that’s not where it ends… I’m getting fat! Lol well I’ve always been fat… but I mean I am getting nice and fluffy! My bae is no longer the gym, my clothes are getting tighter and tighter, and my eating habits have taken on a mind of its own! I was really feeling myself for a minute there, but baby! Lets just say, I can’t hit the stairs without my road dogs: Sweat and Heavy Breathing!
And don’t get me started on careers and finances! I recently changed careers, wich makes the amount that I take home unpredictable! Momma needs her coins, and the thought of not knowing what is coming in and out keeps me up at night. And you remember that wonderful man of mine… yea…he’s great at making that bacon… but I have to be the one in charge of how its spent… which is good and bad. I get to be the BOSS LADY, but I get to have all the stress of keeping it all straight and in line!
Anyone else feeling over whelmed now??? Did you have to lay down??? Yea me too!
But here’s the good news… umm…. lol yeah I don’t know…. it’s 5 o’clock somewhere!?! No seriously, sometimes I hate being that sunny person always looking for the right side of things. You know what things suck right now. Period. End of story. We’re all adults and have been here!